Advice on gay crush's/flirting - Page 3

04TiburonGT · 07-10-2008, 12:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guy0680

Hey I'm back again with some more questions for all of you. Thank you for the responses that I got on my last post here, they were all really helpful and I appreciate it. If your new to my situation, my old post is located HERE

My question this time is about having a gay crush/flirting. This is my first real crush on a guy and I don't know how to react or flirt. We both know each other is gay but are both closeted. We are almost playing a game trying to get the other to slip up and admit it. He has been choosing his words very carefully to describe past relationships, leaving out "Hims", "Hers", "She", "He" etc.. But we each have each made statements to each other that we suspect each other but neither will make the first move.

I asked him the other day if his eye color was real or if he wore colored contacts. He instead told me a story (very carefully and slowly to leave out the sex of the partner I noticed) about how he had been told in the past that his eyes get bluer when he orgasms. Is this flirting/trying to get me interested in sex with him??

My normal response (if a girl had told me that) would have been a corny joke like "oh yeah when are you going to prove it?" or something along the lines, but I didn't because that would have outed me. I instead said "Oh really? We'll thats pretty bad when your eyes are the only thing that they were interested in during it" and winked at him. He smiled/laughed and said "Oh yeah, thats what you think."

Does anyone have any advice on whether that is flirting or not? And any advice on the "game" we are having trying to get the other to slip up?

You are infact flirting. and i'm pretty sure this guy likes you. but you guys have to come out in the open just to each other for now for that to go further. and that game is to see who tells who. but i think you should just tell him how you feel. most of the time it makes things soooooo much better =]

guy0680 · 07-10-2008, 09:07 PM

I've decided that I am going to try to be blunt and tell him...I just have to figure out a good way/time/place to tell him...

guy0680 · 07-12-2008, 08:16 PM

So...today he denied being gay to me...

(He 100% is, I know it for a fact)

Mike · 07-12-2008, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guy0680

So...today he denied being gay to me...

(He 100% is, I know it for a fact)

Uhh .. and how old is this guy? It's not uncommon for someone to be in denial about this. Especially someone younger ..

If you would of asked me if I was gay up until I was 18 .. I would of started laughing and done whatever I could to make you think otherwise. I even made fun of a gay guy in high school because I was indeed insecure about my sexuality at the time. I still regret doing it every single day .. and I probably will for the rest of my life. He sat near me in a class and every day would wink at me and jiggle his eyebrow ring (he was really cute .. and it was a really cute gesture). I had a number of things that I would say to him (none of which I will repeat) .. but he kept doing it. I really do believe that gay people have a "gaydar" and can really see inside of people.

Whether they admit it, is a totally different situation.

guy0680 · 07-12-2008, 09:25 PM

I think you hit it on the head...he is 18...and was kind of making fun of a guy for being bisexual when I asked him...I just don't know what to do now because I blew my chance to ask him because I can't ask again...I have to wait for him to tell me

Mike · 07-13-2008, 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by guy0680

I think you hit it on the head...he is 18...and was kind of making fun of a guy for being bisexual when I asked him...I just don't know what to do now because I blew my chance to ask him because I can't ask again...I have to wait for him to tell me

And just for the record .. it might take him awhile to get comfortable with himself enough to tell you. I was pondering (and in denial) for many years before I actually admitted it to anyone. If he just started getting curious .. it could be a long time before anything develops .. if he's really gay or bi.

guy0680 · 07-13-2008, 06:29 PM

So should I just let it rest for a bit....or come out to him when I talk to him next? Or wait a few days then come out to him

How would I bring it up? "Oh about what we talked about the other day...I'm gay so its okay if you are"

Jamd · 07-14-2008, 01:44 PM

Such a confusing situation...

guy0680 · 07-15-2008, 10:26 PM

So I finally told him via text message (because I knew I wouldn't get up the courage anytime soon...)

Me: So can I tell you something that I haven't gotten up the balls to say in person?
Him: Sure, go for it

Me: So I don't really know how to say this but to just say it...I'm gay too...you would be the first and only person to know so please don't say anything..for some reason I felt like I could tell you
Him: Well now...umm well I guess thats cool and I'm kinda honored that you trust me enough to tell me that, its totally cool and it won't leave my mouth don't worry

Jamd · 07-15-2008, 11:13 PM

That was great of him! Notice his reaction to 'gay too'? There wasn't one! OMG. So, do you know what's going to happen from now?

guy0680 · 07-16-2008, 06:04 PM

So today at work (first time seeing him since coming out to him) was surprisingly good and not awkward (I was expecting myself to be bashful, blushing or avoiding him the whole day) but we just went along like nothing happened.

What should I do now? Ask him to hang out again (I have asked him previously but now that we are out to each other maybe it'll be different)

Today someone jokingly called him fat, and he lifted up his shift to "prove" he wasn't....my god I just wanted to jump his goddamn bones!!

Jamd · 07-17-2008, 01:12 PM

Hehe, whoop! So what happened? Have you asked again?

Seth · 07-17-2008, 06:09 PM

I haven't read anyone's posts. Listen mate, take it from sebastian right 'kiss the girl' (boy). Just have it over with, if he says no, then it's a no, if he says yes, then hop on the good foot and do the bad thing.

guy0680 · 07-18-2008, 11:45 PM

I texted him (I hateee talking on the phone and he doesn't go online) asking him what he was up to tonight and if he wanted to do something....and its 4 hours later and he hasn't texted back yet

I'm frusterateddddd and disappointed!

guy0680 · 07-19-2008, 01:37 AM

Tomorrow/the next time I see him should I say: "Hey what happened last night/the other day? You never answered my text!?" or just not mention it??

07-14-2008, 01:44 PM	#38 (permalink)
Jamd Official GTF Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Africa Gender: Posts: 145	Such a confusing situation... __________________ a man that smiles when something goes wrong has thought of someone to blame it on

07-15-2008, 11:13 PM	#40 (permalink)
Jamd Official GTF Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Africa Gender: Posts: 145	That was great of him! Notice his reaction to 'gay too'? There wasn't one! OMG. So, do you know what's going to happen from now? __________________ a man that smiles when something goes wrong has thought of someone to blame it on

07-17-2008, 01:12 PM	#42 (permalink)
Jamd Official GTF Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South Africa Gender: Posts: 145	Hehe, whoop! So what happened? Have you asked again? __________________ a man that smiles when something goes wrong has thought of someone to blame it on

07-17-2008, 06:09 PM	#43 (permalink)
Seth Official GTF Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: manchestaaaaaoor Gender: Posts: 1,052	I haven't read anyone's posts. Listen mate, take it from sebastian right 'kiss the girl' (boy). Just have it over with, if he says no, then it's a no, if he says yes, then hop on the good foot and do the bad thing. __________________ myspace.com/kthxdan

07-18-2008, 11:45 PM	#44 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	I texted him (I hateee talking on the phone and he doesn't go online) asking him what he was up to tonight and if he wanted to do something....and its 4 hours later and he hasn't texted back yet I'm frusterateddddd and disappointed! Last edited by guy0680; 07-18-2008 at 11:50 PM.

07-10-2008, 09:07 PM	#32 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	I've decided that I am going to try to be blunt and tell him...I just have to figure out a good way/time/place to tell him...

07-12-2008, 08:16 PM	#33 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	So...today he denied being gay to me... (He 100% is, I know it for a fact)

07-12-2008, 09:25 PM	#35 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	I think you hit it on the head...he is 18...and was kind of making fun of a guy for being bisexual when I asked him...I just don't know what to do now because I blew my chance to ask him because I can't ask again...I have to wait for him to tell me

07-13-2008, 06:29 PM	#37 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	So should I just let it rest for a bit....or come out to him when I talk to him next? Or wait a few days then come out to him How would I bring it up? "Oh about what we talked about the other day...I'm gay so its okay if you are"

07-15-2008, 10:26 PM	#39 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	So I finally told him via text message (because I knew I wouldn't get up the courage anytime soon...) Me: So can I tell you something that I haven't gotten up the balls to say in person? Him: Sure, go for it Me: So I don't really know how to say this but to just say it...I'm gay too...you would be the first and only person to know so please don't say anything..for some reason I felt like I could tell you Him: Well now...umm well I guess thats cool and I'm kinda honored that you trust me enough to tell me that, its totally cool and it won't leave my mouth don't worry

07-16-2008, 06:04 PM	#41 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	So today at work (first time seeing him since coming out to him) was surprisingly good and not awkward (I was expecting myself to be bashful, blushing or avoiding him the whole day) but we just went along like nothing happened. What should I do now? Ask him to hang out again (I have asked him previously but now that we are out to each other maybe it'll be different) Today someone jokingly called him fat, and he lifted up his shift to "prove" he wasn't....my god I just wanted to jump his goddamn bones!!

07-19-2008, 01:37 AM	#45 (permalink)
guy0680 Official GTF Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Gender: Posts: 62	Tomorrow/the next time I see him should I say: "Hey what happened last night/the other day? You never answered my text!?" or just not mention it??

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